Sue shared with me what it was like to be divorced at age sixty after a thirty-eight year marriage to someone she had met in high school. She told me, “I didn’t know how to date!”
Through activities like singles groups she met a few people. And she went online for a year, but it was hard:
• People she liked didn’t respond to her.
• People who responded to her weren’t great matches.
One guy who she went out with for a few dates wrote her to say they weren’t compatible. “That hurt!”
But she was determined.
“I really did want someone in my life to grow old with.”
With coaching she learned how to set up a good profile and how to reach out to men online. She learned that for every five people she wrote to, maybe one would respond. She learned:
• It doesn’t mean anything if a man doesn’t respond
• Don’t take every “rejection” personally
• Meet many new people and stay open-minded
She went on “coffee dates” to meet a variety of new men, and met almost thirty people over a two-year period. It wasn’t easy, she says,
“I wanted to quit at certain moments.”
The coaching encouraged her to keep going: “You’re doing well, you’ve caught a few (that you tossed back). Keep fishing!”
Shortly afterwards Sue met someone who shares not only her values, but a common set of friends from their youth.
They are now into their fifth year of happily loving each other.
You have a lot of love and energy you want to give someone. If you want a partner to share this precious time of life…
“Don’t give up! Keep fishing!”
There have been many clients in their late sixties and early seventies who have found lovely men online.
Some of the women had to meet several men before finding someone they felt compatible with.
One client, Donna, who had been married for more than thirty-five years, was nervous about going online. She worried about her low level of knowledge about communicating on the Internet.
At first she didn’t even post a photo of herself on her dating profile (on OurTime). But a nice 70 year old man responded to her profile. On his request she texted him her photo. They went out and found they had a great deal in common – their backgrounds and their current interests.
They were in a similar place in life: they were both self-sufficient, had enjoyed their work and continued to have activities that they cared about. They found joy meeting a potential partner who was actively involved in their children and grandchildren’s lives.
Donna client felt very comfortable. After a few months, and meeting each other’s children, they are an item! (Choosing to hibernate together during the pandemic!) They are both still a little nervous about the future, but clear that they each care about the other a great deal.
Other clients take a little more time to decide…
It’s Raining Men!
My client, Ann, age 72, an avid skier, active in her community, who lives in Utah, says, “Its raining men!” Her problem is deciding between two very substantial 70-year old men who are courting her. She’s decided to take her time and not rush into anything. She doesn’t want to move in with anyone too quickly, even in a quarantine. This is a wise path for a woman who, in the past, has chosen men without enough consideration. I was one of these women – I made my husband wait two years before I agreed to marry him!
My clients did the inner work first (Calling in “The One”) so that when the right/good men showed up, they were ready. And they had coaching support to help them through the many decisions of budding relationships.
Do you want to make yourself ready to call happy healthy love into your life?
What support do you need to begin?
Send me a note and we can talk.